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Posted by on Saturday, June 26 @ 22:43:22 UTC

: You Don't Mean A Thing
on Saturday, June 26 @ 22:43:22 UTC
Alyshia writes:: " Lay on my back
Look at the stars
Close my eyes
And there you are
You live in my heart


Every night when I
Lay down to sleep
I think of you
And start to weep
When I'm alone
I talk to you
You say whatever
I want you to
Sometimes I forget
You're just a dream
And in real life
You don't mean a thing "


 
": You Don't Mean A Thing" | Login/Create an Account | 2 comments | Search Discussion
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Re: You Don't Mean A Thing (Score: 1)
by Chekhovian on Sunday, June 27 @ 13:29:16 UTC
(User Info | Send a Message) http://livejournal.com/users/cannette_noire
Interesting poem, though it sounds like more of a song one might hear on the radio. It's good, but nothing to really boast about because the poem is laboring unsuccessfully around cliches and hackneyed ideas. It's a good poem for that, but not great or particularly interesting.

Keep on writing
--Brooke


Re: You Don't Mean A Thing (Score: 1)
by Kimi on Monday, June 28 @ 04:01:43 UTC
(User Info | Send a Message) http://www.lordofme.4t.com
Although the subject and the way the poem's written are not very original I like the way it flows and fits together. I'm not sure about the phrase "you don't mean a thing" though - is that meant to mean that you don't care about this person, or that they don't care about you? If it's the former the poem contradicts itself! But there we go, nice poem.


 
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