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Posted by
on Wednesday, November 17 @ 00:36:27 UTC
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: so sad
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on Wednesday, November 17 @ 00:36:27 UTC
Anonymous writes:: " A mother and father i thought we could be
but i lost my baby and i know how it is for you to see.
but this i would never lie
lie about some poor baby for no reason that had to die.
i wish i could prove it but the answer if left unknown
i wish i was a couple of more weeks so i could have started to shown.
it was a few months ago but still it is really hard so i write poems while i sit and cry
i blamed it on my self for ages but then i thought to my self maybe it wasn't the right time
you know what makes it really harder than , i loved darren so much
we could of had a family, but theres no baby to cuddle or touch
i really wish i had an answer to show
so the you wouldnt judge me as a liar and then you'd all know
16 and been through this all
try to act happy but all these tears do is fall
a teenager that thought she was going to be a mother but didnt get there
is somethink hurtful and i think it is really unfair
and even harder when you know you deserved to
but weither you beilive it or not it is up to you
like i said this i would not lie about my poor baby for no reason had to die
bye kylie jenkins
"
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Re: so sad (Score: 1)
by angelkisss143 on Wednesday, November 17 @ 01:15:49 UTC
(User Info | Send a Message) | | It’s a hard thing to lose a child, especially one that has not been born. I like the feelings you put into your work, but I think you were trying too hard to make it rhyme that some of your feelings got lost... I know having some one tell you to rewrite something that has meaning to you can seem a little harsh, but I think that if you redo this one, and not worry about rhyming, you will have a great poem that also shows your "true" emotions... always keep writing... and keep your head up girl, you're only 16, and when the time is right, you will be blessed with a child, but don't rush it, live life to the fullest... that way when you have your child, you feel like you've missed out on anything... :) |
Re: so sad (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Wednesday, November 17 @ 02:47:20 UTC | | THIS POEM IS COOL |
Re: so sad (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Wednesday, November 17 @ 02:48:11 UTC | you and darren must be in love i give you my love
i really love this poem
keep your head up girl |
Re: so sad (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Wednesday, December 01 @ 08:26:53 UTC | what can I say besides this poem is so sad???
JDcool |
Re: so sad (Score: 1)
by Trini-smurf on Friday, December 03 @ 22:15:40 UTC
(User Info | Send a Message) | bitch did you have an abortion
To God those things are aboninations |
- Re: so sad by Anonymous on Sunday, December 12 @ 22:20:43 UTC
Re: so sad (Score: 1)
by MJ on Wednesday, December 08 @ 18:45:07 UTC
(User Info | Send a Message) | | This is a very sad and upsetting poem. It must have been really hard.... Well done on a great poem though *~*MJ*~* |
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Poem's Rating
Average Score: 5
Votes: 1
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