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Posted by
on Wednesday, December 22 @ 11:59:33 UTC
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: X
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on Wednesday, December 22 @ 11:59:33 UTC
eyerice writes:: " Take a pill - one or two?
Oh, take a few- What could it do?
Everything is now so bright and shiny!
Woah look at my feet they look so tiny!
Whats this feeling in my head?
Am I floating, am I dead?
Where are my friends- where did they go?
I look all around- I just dont know......
Wait- now I cannot see..
Im falling down-whats happening to me?
As I come to my world is spinning-
I wish I could go back to the beginning.
Blood trickles down from a bump on my head.
Why did they leave me- I cant remember what they said.
I found a little knife- Ill cut my skin-
I cannot feel it- Ill do it again
I want to go home- but what will I say?
Could I even find my way?
I get up and run as fast as I can....
ripping my dress as I fall in the sand.
I come to a house and knock on the door-
Im dirty and bleeding - I dont know what for-
The lady who answers brings me inside.
She then calls for help- I just want to hide.
The flashing is coming from the ambulance light
My mother is crying, everything is so bright.
Tears stream down as I look in her eyes-
I make up a story full of lies.
I couldnt tell the truth, what would she say?
Im ashamed I almost took my life away.
The drug I took is a common one too-
Please dont let this happen to you.
It all seems now like a terrible dream.
I almost died at the age of 14.
This is a true story- of someone as beautiful as an angel- who almost became one the night of a school dance. A dark haired, blue eyed- tiny girl. Our children are precious hold them close to your hearts. I couldnt imagine loosing her that day- We would of never known why she took her own life away- but it wasnt her it was the effect of the drug.
Take care my beautiful Angel,
Love Mother "
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Re: X (Score: 1)
by luckybratt89 on Wednesday, December 22 @ 13:16:37 UTC
(User Info | Send a Message) | | Wow this is a good poem makes me stop and realize wat the littelist things can do to u!! |
- Re: X by eyerice on Wednesday, December 22 @ 13:27:51 UTC
Re: X (Score: 1)
by Orobourus (Burningbright2@aol.com) on Wednesday, December 22 @ 22:25:29 UTC
(User Info | Send a Message) | Thats so horrible, ecstasy, one of the worst drugs out there today along with the date rape drug.....and the funny thing is, kids are afraid to tell their parents....about anything. From being pregnant to something like this. I blame it partly on society partly on the adults. Society scares children into thinking that certain things they do are sinful....so much they wont admit to there small falls from from grace, simply based on what the media and society says will cause them more pain by coming forward. then the adults who are supposed to be in charge forget their rebelious hay days where they experimented and say things like they'll punish the child if they find out. what the hell, i dont know, but as a teenager, that only would make me more rebelious and terrified of coming forward....so much id put my life in jeopardy. then there are those adults who dont even care, and these adults shouldnt be parents anyhow.
it sounds to me, if even you didnt understand what this girl went through in her final hours....that she was conflicted in her induced mind by not knowing whether to come forward about the reason for her seeming suicide. her stomach would be pumped and a transfusion put in place if she had just said something.....
I loved the diction and syntax. you make it seem like the reader is looking into this girls life.....its a sort of floating feeling when one reads this.....it paralleles with the affect of ecstasy, good job
Elinor |
- Re: X by eyerice on Thursday, December 23 @ 11:07:48 UTC
Re: X (Score: 1)
by chukkii on Wednesday, December 22 @ 23:00:36 UTC
(User Info | Send a Message) | I really liked the fact that when I read this piece, I felt as if i was actually seeing this happen. The world is full of dangerous drugs. And this one is rising just as fast as the others. We as parents need to hold on to our kids a little tighter because the devil is always at work. I'm glad the girl is okay. And this writing tells you even if it's your first time to try it, it could very well also be your last. Good job!
Chukkii |
- Re: X by eyerice on Thursday, December 23 @ 11:08:14 UTC
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Poem's Rating
Average Score: 5
Votes: 1
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