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Posted by
on Thursday, January 06 @ 02:14:44 UTC
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: Do I Look Happy?... 'Cause I'm Not.
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on Thursday, January 06 @ 02:14:44 UTC
AnnP writes:: " Do I put on a "GOOD" happy face? Good 'cause I don't want people to know that I'm not.
I haven't been happy since 3 days after my wedding, when my husband had to go back to war. People say they know, but they don't.
All I do now is eat all day.
Every 15 min I'm getting something, chocolate, chips, cookies, burritos, cereal, sandwiches, it's just more food, more food, more food. Why? Why not? I have nothing else to do all day other than wonder why I haven't heard from my husband in 2 weeks and because I feel like I have to.
I don't sleep anymore, I'm tired, but I can't sleep.
more times than I care to admit I see 5 in the morning before I go to sleep to get up at 7 in the morning. Why? I don't know, maybe it's because my husband is on the other side of the world, and I can't touch him, I can't see him, I can't fall asleep with his arms wrapped around me.
Did I say it was an honor to be a military wife?.... 'Cause more often than not I don't feel that way.
I want my husband.
I hear people say that if they hear about another american soldier dying they are going to be upset.
I beleive them, but I can't take them at face value.
Because I woder do they have a husband, mother, father, sister, brother, cousin overthere?!
When they hear about a soldier dying do they stay up praying that they will never get that knock on the door saying "I'm sorry Mrs. P, but your husband died with honor"
FUCK HONOR!!!!!!!
I don't want honor.
I want my husband.
I don't want a flag that was laid over his coffen.
A Flag can't hold me, make love to me, kiss me, give me children.
I want my husband.
I don't want some medals that showed his "Honor & Bravery"
Medals can't hold me & comfort me when I had a fucked up night at work in the layaway dept. in Wal-Mart because some dumbass called the manager on me because I wouldn't let them put Laundry Detergent on Layaway.
A Flag and some Medals can't comfort me when I get into an argument with my Mother, Father, or Brother.
A Flag and Medals can't make me feel better when I get into an argument with my best friend because she's dating a Loser who won't divorce his wife who left him on their 1 year anniversery.
I want my husband.
I want my husband.
I want my husband.
I want my life back.
I want to fall asleep because I want to, not because I am so exhausted from not sleeping that I have no choice.
I want my husband back.
I want to not cry anymore. I'm so tired of crying.
I want my husband back.
Do I Look Happy?... 'Cause I'm Not. "
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Re: Do I Look Happy?... 'Cause I'm Not. (Score: 0)
by Anonymous on Thursday, January 06 @ 20:35:16 UTC | | very touching-deep! |
Re: Do I Look Happy?... 'Cause I'm Not. (Score: 1)
by eressea (morgiel_daewen@yahoo.com) on Sunday, January 09 @ 21:33:36 UTC
(User Info | Send a Message) http://www.xanga.com/not_scene_chick | this is good...i like how it seems that you just started writing out of sheer emotion, and this beautiful piece of work came out...i write the same way, sometimes...i hope you get your husband back...
and please keep writing...
eressea |
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Poem's Rating
Average Score: 5
Votes: 1
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